Into the deep dark abyss...

This is a very difficult post to write

.My wonderful, kind, sweet Dad has been diagnosed with Stage 3 lung cancer.

I am in total shock and denial!

It was completely unexpected and as with any cancer diagnosis has shattered our happy lives.

We found out early last week when a biopsy for a small spot on his right lung came back positive. A PET two days later showed the cancer had spread to nearby lymph nodes which makes it a Stage3A. The statistics are terrifying so at this time we are focused on geting the medical team in place and to come up with a treatment plan.

Here is how it came about.

My Dad has been having back issues for years and had a minimally invasive back surgery in Falll 2015. That surgery did not quite work so his back pain returned last year with a vengence. My Dad met with several doctors and finally decided to schedule back surgery - spinal fusion. The surgey was booked for April 2.

Prior to surgery, my dad's surgeon wanted clearances from all my Dad"s doctors. So, the past month my Dad has been busy getting all that completed. One of the doctor's my Dad goes to is a pulmonologist. He went to him in Jul 2017 for cough and phlegm. At the time a CT scan had shown a small spot on his right lung. The spot was very small and the pulmonologist was not worried and told my Dad that they would watch it for a few months.

When my Dad went back a couple of weeks ago for his clearance for surgery the spot was still there, still small, and again the plan was to come back in about 4 mos.

However, when the back surgeon saw the pulmonologist's report, he insisted upon a biopsy of the spot!

So, about 2 weeks ago my Dad went in for a bippsy. None of us were worried - we liked that the surgeon was being cautious but had no expectation of anything but a benign outcome. In fact the male nurse who was prepping my Dad even mentioned that he was surprised they were biopsying something so small (~1cm).

Couple of days passed and it crossed my mind to ask my Mom if they got the results. But then she called me and told me it was postive.

I was shocked.

Positive - that means Cancer!

WTF!!!

Two days later my dad went in for a PET scan. Again I hoped for the best, but on Friday night we learned that they saw some suspicious lymph nodes and they suspect its spread. All other parts of the body were clear!

Luckily my sister's good friend, G, is an oncologist. G was on vacation in Spain when all this was going on. She booked my Dad for an appt at 9am Mon (3/19) to see her. She gave the bad news about stage 3 but is optimistic that it can be treated.

Yesterday (Wed) we met with the Oncology Med Director. He was very nice and has suggested surgery as an option to the radiation and chemo. It has been shown to have a slight edge in such cases so worth considering.  He personally called the thorarcic surgeon and got my dad an appt for next Tue.

Today we are going to do radiation simulation and later meet with the nurse to do Chemo education.

And so begins our journey in to the deep, dark abyss of this terrible disease. A journey I had hoped our family could have been spared.

Yesterday after spending 3 hrs at the hospital meeting with Dr etc, I came home and cried. It all suddenly seemed real.

I cried for my Dad who has to go through it all. His back is still in a lot of pain, so this new problem just adds to his misery. He is 80 years old and suddenly looks so frail and is confused with all the terms and information being given to us.

I cried for my Mom, who lost her mother, brother and sister over the ast few years and now has to deal with this.

I cried for the grim statistics and the fact that I could lose my Dad so much sooner than I expected.

This is all so surreal.

Two weeks ago we were all focused on getting Beanie' ears pierced and planning her 5th birthday this weekend.

But no time for sadness...

I need to rally.

We HAVE to look at the bright side:

1. We caught this disease soon enough. I know its Stage 3 but the tumor is tiny and the nodes are on the same side of the lung. It has not spread beyond that.
2. My Dad does not have any symptoms of the cancer itself. He is more bothered by the stenosis back pain.
3. The hospital where he will be treated is our local hospital which is about 10-15 min away. So that makes the travel logistics easier since he will have to go for radiation everyday.
4. The hospital is affitlated to the Texas Andersen Cancer Clinic which is a top cancer hospital. They plan to do genetic testing of the tumor to see if there are mutations that can be treated with targeted therapy.
5. My sister's friend is managing his care so there is personal involvement. Even the Dr we met today went out of his way to personally call the surgeon to book my Dad in asap.
6. There have been a lot of advancements in lung cancer the past 4-5 years - targeted therapy, immunotheray, etc, so we are hopeful for a better outcome.

I want to blog about this, since its helpful to get it out of my system.  But this is Beanie's blog... so I may start another one.

My sister went with my parents to the first appt. because her friend said she should come. Yesterday I went with them, and today (Thurs) I have taken a day off from work to go for both appts. I hope my sister pitches in and does not leave it all to me. She said she would so we shall see.....

Please say a prayer for my Dad and our family as he begins his hard journey. Thanks.